.:everytime i close my eyes, i tremble with fear:.

 
 
Thursday, July 3
 
leeerrr.....makin hari makin baru diak inin blogger. aku pon naik pening kepala mcm mana nak navigate bende alah nie....anyways, im suppsed to do stuffs at home yesterday nite but u was held back by 2 of my so called frens. wtf, im kinda bored at home anyway. ergh.....

got to meet her yesterday at hougang mall. dia mintak kiss kau.....kehrkehrkehrke aku tak kasi.....muahahahaha

i am soooooo evil...

kehrkehrkehrke aku tak tau sejak dua menjak nie aku hyper giler babi. sumbody stop me!! mlm ni aku mcm malas nak gi mad monks. sebab kan....kan...kan....besok aku nak turun hrc!!!

alamak....aku lupa, aziah nikah siak besok. mcm mana aku nak naik motor dgn baju kurung!?!?!? dat will get me thinking fer the while day today. ehemz....motor kepeeeeee......ade org nak antar.....ok per?

lehrkehrekhr dah ah....aku malas nak ckp byk2. yesterday nuthin much happened. dats it......

will blog layta..............

Wednesday, July 2
 
yoohoo....i dunnoe y i am so hyper today. issit becoz i got to meet her? issit becoz i feel dat im begining to love her? i dunnoe...my mind is running wild. i cant think straight. maybe its time for me to take a break from all this. "have a break, have a VODKA" muakakaka! siak jer aku nie tau. stress jer minum. bila mau mampus pun aku tak tau. apesal siak aku dgr lagu jiwang nie?! ehemz....change of mood kirakan....hehe...

he didnt sms me the whole dat today. maybe he's bz or sumthing. well, not really into it anyway. i dunnoe how the hell im gonna ride his bike this saturday with my baju kurung. ergh....it seems to me dat everybody is getting married. bila eh aku nyer turn agaknyer? skola tak abes, kejer tak ade. ade hati nak kawin. chet!

hmm...talking abt werk, irma went fer the coffee bean interview at scotts. i wanted to go too tapi kan....abg aku mcm siak dia suruh aku buatkan powerpoint utk dia. chet! takda guna punya abang. but den.....i got paid! heehee....alah...setakat 10 buckz pon ok per...

later today im still thinking if i wanna help my mum. mcm malas siak gitu tunjuk muka aku pat skolah sial tu. ergh....i soooo hate the students down there. tak sadar baru secondary skool nak kerek depan aku.....blegh! i cant even be bothered. asal nari aku type macam cepat gitu. muahahaha......hyper gila siak aku!!

aku bosaaaannn! tadi agency called me up saying dat i haf to go fer the interview next monday morning at 9.30am. pukiwak....dia ingat aku leh bangun pagi peh org keper??? argh.....aku dah dua hari tak tido nie......lama2 mata aku nanti jadi cam panda......tak nak akuuuu.....eeee

sejak bila lah aku blog pakai bahasa melayu nie? hehehe....kekek siak.....aku tak tau asal dgn aku ari nie.....aarrrgghh.....kehrkehrkehrke

Tuesday, July 1
 
hello. how are we today? hmm...to start things off, im in a position where everything i do is not logic. i tend to think before making any actions but today, it's a whole different story altogether. you can notice it in this entry. pointless. yes. pointless. i dunnoe if im getting sumwhere by the end of this paragraph but all i noe is dat i juz called the bitch up and asked her out. n i dunnoe y i did dat. she looks so beautiful yesterday. im falling in love with her all over again. but no, i haf to keep in mind that im straight. i hafta be strong. i can if i work hard at it.

it rained today n i slept thru the whole time. i am so tired of being used. i am so tired of being there for people. i am so tired of helping. but if i dun do all these, who will? as i am a very soft hearted person, i am easily being used for alot of things. i haf no powere against myself. i am willing but there's always a limit to it. its like in this particular entry, im typing away as my mind is wandering somewhere else.

huh? where was i?

Sunday, June 29
 
Rohayati Abu Bakar. A woman with an attitude. A woman whom i've loved for 3 months. A woman whom i always fought with. A woman who always been jealous if i was out without her. A woman who loved me...NOT!

well, anyway, she called me saying dat Lan is in prison and she's lonely and yada yada yada...the story goes on and on. seeking sympathy. as usual. im her crying shoulder.

im sick of ppl making me their spare part. i noe eventhough i said dat i will be there for that particular person, doesnt mean dat i can be there for you whenever u haf absolutely no one when the fact is you do have some. or maybe 2 to be exact. y cant they help? y must u turn to me? after all the things ive done for you. after all the shit you have put me through. sometimes i don't understand. is this wat they call the result of waiting for that special someone like in the saying "if you love dat person, you have to learn to let go. if they come back, they're meant to be yours." so is this situation telling me dat she's the one for me? she's PREGNANT for god's sake! aaaaaarrrrrrgggggggghhhhh.

nabuey cibai. i juz hate my life as i live it.......
 
waduuuuuhhh.....waduh waduh.......takleh carry aku.....
im like on a clubbing marathon this week....fri was lame coz the usual ppl were not there but i got hooked up wif a couple of girls. i was high so....u shud noe lah huh.....hehehe....
Tien, Arlene, Hans and An came kinda late.....i was already stoned. neways, really did not notice Shikin but that nite she kinda caught my eye and i dunnoe y. i knew she was adek's ex gf and i tried to put dat into my head. we were dancing when a fight broke out btwn 2 femmes and a butch....heh....
thankz to ronnie fer sending me to and fro. he's such a nice guy.

come saturday, which was yesterday, didnt intend to go anywhere coz i was really wanted to rest. when i was cleaning out my cupboard, El called me and ask me out to hard rock. fuyoooh.....a part of me wanna rest but another major part of me wanted to go as it has been a long time since i went there. sure enuff, i saw Shaz. but i didnt expect Ruby to be there....high on alcohol...heh....
my cousin got a new gf! hehehe...i can barely hear her voice....i think it was Shidah? she's so cuteeee....

the fone juz rang. i hate people asking me stupid questions. dats wats u get if u haf a police officer for a brother....sheesh!

anyways....i wanted to get drunk at hard rock but i didnt noe y the vodka taste like fuck. eventually i gave the free coupons to Adek, Hans and Yaya. i was looking around for Suri....i want my globe shoes back....ah well, maybe she went to hendrix or jamz....i dunnoe.....i noticed dat Farah haf a new tattoo...hhmmm....

my dad's selling away this house. we're gonna move out soon. he said he's getting a bigger one. a 5-room flat. ergh....i hate to leave this place. my room is already in my fav colour......and i already planned wat to do wif my room when my sis gets married and move out......hmph....

evanescence rocks! shite...hahaha....but seriously.....take a listen to it....and u'll get bored by the 5th time. trust me.

 

 
 
19.female.

unemployed.slacker.

music.drums.

 
   
 
.:tHe PasT:.

the world is mine now, to hell with you...

 
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Lil Kim feat. 50 Cent - Magic Stick

 

.:eXit:.  |  .:tHe PasT:.